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  1. 0 reviews 0 5 5 5 out of 5 stars 5/5
    7.3 hrs • 9/20/2016 • Unabridged

    The possibly true memoir of the actor, raconteur, gambler, former SNL cast member, and one of the best stand-up comedians of all time As its title suggests, Norm Macdonald tells the story of his life—more or less—from his origins in a rural small town in the-back-of-beyond Canada to an epically disastrous appearance on Star Search, to his possibly incredible account of auditioning for Lorne Michaels and his memorable run as the anchor of Saturday Night Live’s “Weekend Update.” But Based on a True Story is much more than a memoir, it’s a hilarious, inspired, very meta imagining of his life, as told to a deeply disturbed ghost writer whose teetering sanity and bruised ego threaten to take down the entire narrative—and possibly the comic with it. Peppered with classic jokes and long mythologized Hollywood stories, this wildly adventurous, tense, totally original, and absurdly funny memoir turns the conventional “comic’s memoir” on its head and leaves the listener delightfully off kilter.

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    Based on a True Story

    7.3 hrs • 9/20/16 • Unabridged
    0 reviews 0 5 5 5 out of 5 stars 5/5
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  2. 7.7 hrs • 9/13/2016 • Unabridged

    When New Yorker staff writer Lauren Collins moves to Geneva, Switzerland, she decides to learn French—not just to be able to go about her day-to-day life, but in order to be closer to her French husband and his family. When in French is at once a hilarious and idiosyncratic memoir about the things we do for love, and an exploration across cultures and history into how we learn languages, and what they say about who we are. In her late twenties, Lauren Collins moved to London, and fell in love with, and married, Olivier, a handsome French mathematician. When he has to relocate to Geneva for his work, she decides to go with him. In Geneva, however, Lauren is lost for words, literally: not only can she not communicate to the local chimney-sweep when he visits, but, watching Olivier converse fluently in French every day, she is also made painfully aware that she has never really spoken to her husband in his own language. She can say, “au revoir” and “bonjour” but that’s about it. “Hello and goodbye were a pair of bookends,” she writes, “propping up a vast library of blank volumes, void almanacs, novels full of sentiment I couldn’t apprehend.” What will happen when she has children? she wonders. If they grow up speaking French, will they be stuck with a “Borat of a mother” who can’t properly understand them? So she embarks on a quest to learn French, and, in doing so, must tangle with the intricacies of French culture—which, it turns out, is a far cry from family life back home in North Carolina. Down the rabbit hole of French Collins hurtles; role-playing with her classmates at language school; coming to terms with antique French social customs; accidently writing explicit “thank you” notes to her French in-laws; and delving into the strange and wonderful history of humanity’s many forms of language. When in French is a moving, laugh-out-loud funny memoir about falling in love, learning another language, and living far from home, as well as a freewheeling history of language. Collins investigates, among other things, how children acquire speech, the history of the idea of “American” as its own language, and why we don’t trust people who adopt accents. (Her own father takes on a southern accent after moving to North Carolina, much to her mother’s chagrin.) Plumbing the depths of the mysteries of foreign languages, Collins confesses—with style, sparkling humor, and touching honesty—to the frustrations, pleasures, surprises, and, finally, satisfactions of learning French.

    Available Formats: CD, Download

    When in French

    7.7 hrs • 9/13/16 • Unabridged
    CD
    Also: Download
  3. 0.1 hrs • 7/5/2016 • Unabridged

    What do you do when you spot a wild Trump in the election season? New York Times bestselling author and comedian Michael Ian Black has some sage advice for children (and all the rest of us who are scratching our heads in disbelief) in this perfectly timely parody book intended for adults that would be hysterical if it weren’t so true. The beasty is called an American Trump. Its skin is bright orange, its figure is plump. Its fur so complex, you might get enveloped. Its hands, though are, sadly, underdeveloped. The Trump is a curious creature, very often spotted in the wild, but confounding to our youngest citizens. A business mogul, reality TV host, and now … political candidate? Kids (and, let’s be honest, many adults) might have difficulty discerning just what this thing that’s been dominating news coverage this election cycle is. Could he actually be real? Are those … words coming out of his mouth? Why are his hands so tiny? And, perhaps most importantly, what on earth do you do when you encounter an American Trump? With his signature wit and a classic style, comedian Michael Ian Black introduces those unfamiliar with the Americus Trumpus to his distinguishing features and his mystifying campaign for world domination … sorry … president of the United States.

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    A Child's First Book of Trump

    0.1 hrs • 7/5/16 • Unabridged
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  4. 6.8 hrs • 6/14/2016 • Unabridged

    Jenny Mollen is a writer and actress living in New York. Until two years ago, her life was exciting, sexy, a little eccentric, and one hundred percent impulsive. She had a husband who embraced her crazy—who understood her need to occasionally stalk around the house in his ex-girlfriend’s old beach caftans and to invite their drug dealer to Passover seder (so he wouldn’t feel like they were using him only for drugs). Then they had their son, Sid, and overnight, Jenny was forced to grow up: to be responsible, to brush her hair, to listen to her voicemail. Live Fast Die Hot is a collection of stories about what happens when you realize that some things are more important than crafting the perfect tweet. It follows Jenny to Morocco, where she embarks on a quest to prove to herself that she can travel alone without reenacting a plotline from Taken. It shows her confronting demons—most of them from childhood, a few from the spirit realm. And it culminates in Peru, where Jenny decides that maybe the cure for her worries lies at the bottom of a cup of ayahuasca. Hilarious, outlandish, and surprisingly affecting, Live Fast Die Hot reminds you that even if you aren’t cut out for adulthood, at least you can be better at it than your mother.

    Available Formats: Download

    Live Fast Die Hot

    6.8 hrs • 6/14/16 • Unabridged
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  5. 9.5 hrs • 6/7/2016 • Unabridged

    From legendary comedian D. L. Hughley comes a bitingly funny send-up of the Obama years, as “told” by the key political players on both sides of the aisle. What do the Clintons, Republicans, fellow Democrats, and Obama’s own family really think of President Barack Obama? Finally, the truth is revealed in this raucously funny “oral history” parody. There is no more astute—and hilarious—critic of politics, entertainment, and race in America than D. L. Hughley, famed comedian, radio star, and original member of the “Kings of Comedy.” In the vein of Jon Stewart’s America: The Book, Black Man, White House is an acerbic and witty take on Obama’s two terms, looking at the president’s accomplishments and foibles through the imagined eyes of those who saw history unfold. Hughley draws upon satirical interviews with the most notorious public figures of our day: Mitt Romney (“What’s ‘poverty’? Is that some sort of rap jargon?”); Nancy Pelosi (“I play F**k/Marry/Kill, and there’s a lot more kills than fu**ks in Congress, believe me.”); Rod Blagojevich (“You can’t sell political offices on eBay; I discovered that personally.”); Joe Biden (“I like wrestling.”); and other politicians, media pundits, and buffoons. It is sure to be the most irreverent—and perhaps the most honest—look at American politics today.

    Available Formats: Download, CD, MP3 CD
    Black Man, White House by D. L. Hughley

    Black Man, White House

    By D. L. Hughley, with Michael Malice
    Performed by a full cast
    9.5 hrs • 6/7/16 • Unabridged
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    Also: CD, MP3 CD
  6. 2.9 hrs • 5/24/2016 • Unabridged

    This book is important, and not just because it’s about Donald Trump. It is essential listening for anyone who wants to discover the official Trump brand origin story, to learn his positions on vital issues like: the military, “Are These the Biggest Missiles We Have?” science, “If Einstein Was So Smart, Why Wasn’t He Rich?” and good government, “Of the Good People, by the Good People, and for the Good People.” Through hilarious stories, photo mashups, official documents, and future newspaper clippings, listeners will experience life under the leadership of President Trump. This is the road map every citizen needs to thrive and survive in a “Trumpocalypse.” Remember, it will be Trump’s America, but you have to live in it.

    Available Formats: Download

    Trump's America

    2.9 hrs • 5/24/16 • Unabridged
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  7. 0 reviews 0 5 5 5 out of 5 stars 5/5
    9.3 hrs • 5/17/2016 • Unabridged

    Andi Dorfman, the beloved finalist of season eighteen of The Bachelor who infamously rejected Juan Pablo and went on to star on season ten of The Bachelorette, dishes about what it’s like to live out a love story—and its collapse—in front of the cameras, offering hard-won advice for moving on after a break-up, public or not. Andi Dorfman, star of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, talks candidly about what it’s like to be courted by twenty-five handsome, single men in this juicy, insider’s peek at dating—and breaking up—on national television. She shares entertaining and heartfelt stories about her fellow Bachelor alums—many of whom are still close friends—comes clean about calling out Bachelor #18 Juan Pablo for bad behavior, and reflects on her personal challenges and uplifting experiences in love that she hopes will help you get through your own break-ups with grace and style.

    Available Formats: Download

    It’s Not Ok

    9.3 hrs • 5/17/16 • Unabridged
    0 reviews 0 5 5 5 out of 5 stars 5/5
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  8. 6.7 hrs • 5/10/2016 • Unabridged

    With his signature matter-of-fact humor, comedian and musician Dave Hill explores his increasingly close relationship with his recently widowed father in a series of painfully funny essays you will want to read again and again by the fire, at the beach, in a truck stop men’s room, or just about anywhere. It’s your call, really. These days, Dave has just the right amount of spare time to write books at home, preferably in his underwear, but things weren’t always perfect. When he found himself pushing thirty while still living with his parents in Cleveland, unsuited for anything but what an “employment expert” vaguely called a career in “art, music, writing, or entertainment,” he decided to visit some friends in New York for the weekend and never left. However, getting his life together wasn’t as easy as he’d hoped, and even an illegally subletted, rent controlled fifth-floor walk-up studio apartment with a (for the most part) working toilet wasn’t glamorous enough to erase the fact that his four siblings were all married with steady jobs and actual human offspring. And in recent years, Dave’s father had grown tired of loaning him cash and living alone in the empty family home, neither of which made much sense to Dave, but whatever. Through the process of his father’s eventual move to a retirement community, Dave and his dad bonded over the things in life that really matter: scorching-hot rock jams, the gluten allergy craze, eighteen-wheelers, Italian food (pizza and spaghetti), and whatever else could possibly be left after that. Meanwhile, Dave discovered his late-blooming manhood via experiences as disparate and dangerous as a visit to a remote Mexican prison, where he learned that people everywhere love the Eagles, and a martial arts class that pushed his resolve and his groin to their limit. In Dave Hill Doesn’t Live Here Anymore, Hill’s voice is sharp, carefree, laced with just the right amount of profanity, and he is—seemingly despite himself—deeply empathetic as he portrays a difficult time in his family’s life and grows up just enough to realize that maybe he and his dad aren’t so different after all.

    Available Formats: Download

    Dave Hill Doesn’t Live Here Anymore

    Read by Dave Hill
    6.7 hrs • 5/10/16 • Unabridged
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  9. 1.7 hrs • 5/3/2016 • Unabridged

    Against all odds, the Donald doesn’t appear to be going away anytime soon. Astonishingly, Trump’s lead over the Republican field of presidential candidates appears to widen with each passing week. The worst-case scenario playing out across the Land of the Free: What if he actually wins the election?! In President Trump, the special collector’s edition parody magazine from bestselling authors Tom Connor and Jim Downey, readers will discover the full range of President Trump’s plans—such as they are—for the nation’s highest office. From the heavily plagiarized Inauguration address to the new Cabinet of highly inappropriate members, and from the rebranding of the White House to hot-topic issues such as immigration and countries worth bombing, readers will quickly learn why one of the scariest words in the English language this year may be “elected!”

    Available Formats: Download

    President Trump

    1.7 hrs • 5/3/16 • Unabridged
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  10. 7.5 hrs • 4/12/2016 • Unabridged

    New York Times bestselling author and stand-up comedian Jen Kirkman delivers a hilarious, candid memoir about marriage, divorce, sex, turning forty, and still not quite having life figured out. Jen Kirkman wants to be the voice in your head that says, “Hey, you’re okay. Even if you sometimes think you aren’t! And especially if other people try to tell you you’re not.” In I Know What I’m Doing—and Other Lies I Tell Myself, Jen offers up all the gory details of a life permanently in progress. She reassures you that it’s okay to not have life completely figured out, even when you reach middle age (and find your first gray pubic hair). She talks about making unusual or unpopular life decisions (such as cultivating a “friend with benefits” or not going home for the holidays) because you don’t necessarily want for yourself what everyone else seems to think you should. It’s about renting when everyone says you should own, dating around when everyone thinks you should settle down, and traveling alone when everyone pities you for going to Paris without a man. From marriage to divorce and sex to mental health, I Know What I’m Doing—and Other Lies I Tell Myself is about embracing the fact that life is a bit of a sh*t show and it’s definitely more than okay to stay true to yourself.

    Available Formats: Download
    Download
  11. 8.3 hrs • 4/5/2016 • Unabridged

    A star-studded collection of essays from acclaimed and bestselling authors and celebrities that illuminates the lasting power of desire and longing, and celebrates our initiation into the euphoria, pain, and mystery that is our first celebrity crush. You never forget your first crush … CRUSH brings together stories of heartbreak, humiliation, and hilarity from a roster of popular luminaries, including James Franco, Carrie Fisher, Stephen King, Roxane Gay, Jodi Picoult, Emily Gould, and Hanna Rosin, who share intimate memories of that first intense taste of love. Here are funny, whimsical, sometimes cringe-worthy tales of falling head over heels for River Phoenix, Mary Tyler Moore, Howard Cosell, Jared Leto, and a host of other pop culture icons. A few contributors channeled their devotion into obsessively writing embarrassing fan letters. Some taped pics in school lockers. Others decorated their bedroom walls with posters. For tweenaged Karin Tanabe, it was discovering bad boy Andy Garcia—playing the gun-loving mobster Vincent Corleone in The Godfather III. Barbara Graham unsuccessfully staked out an apartment on Park Avenue for a glimpse of her blue-eyed soulmate, Paul Newman. There was only one puppy for six-year-old Jodi Picoult—Donny Osmond—while Jamie Brisick’s pre-teen addiction was Speed Racer. Swoon-worthy and unforgettable, the essays in CRUSH will leave you laughing, make you cry, and keep you enthralled—just like your first celebrity crush.

    Available Formats: Download, CD, MP3 CD
    Crush by Cathy Alter, Dave Singleton

    Crush

    With essays by Stephen King, Jodi Picoult, James Franco, and others
    8.3 hrs • 4/5/16 • Unabridged
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    Also: CD, MP3 CD
  12. 3.7 hrs • 4/5/2016 • Unabridged

    Based on the wildly popular Instagram account @CrazyJewishMom, Kate Siegel’s essay collection is about life with the woman who redefined the term “helicopter mom.” There is nothing more wonderful than a mother’s love. There is also nothing more annoying. Who else can proudly insist that you’re perfect while simultaneously making you question every career, fashion, and relationship decision you have ever made? No one understands the delicate mother-daughter dynamic better than Kate Siegel—her own mother drove her so crazy that she decided to broadcast their hilarious conversations on Instagram. Soon, hundreds of thousands of people were following their daily text exchanges, eager to see what outrageous thing Kate’s mom would do next. Now, in Mother, Can You Not?, Kate pays tribute to the woman whose helicopter parenting may make your mom look like Mother Teresa. If fans think Kate’s mom’s texts are insane, they will laugh out loud at the anecdotes her daughter shares in this collection. From embarrassing moments (like her mother’s surprise early morning visit, catching Kate in bed with her crush) to outrageous stories (such as the time she moved cross country to be near Kate’s college) to hilarious mantras (“No STD test. You won’t be getting sexed!”), Mother, Can you NOT? lovingly lampoons the lengths to which our mothers will go to better our lives (even if it feels like they’re ruining them in the process).

    Available Formats: Download

    Mother, Can You Not?

    3.7 hrs • 4/5/16 • Unabridged
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  13. 3.4 hrs • 4/5/2016 • Unabridged

    Dr. Alex Schiller doles out hilarious yet profoundly wise dating advice in her new sex and dating manual, which will transform you into an exceptional individual capable of seducing everyone you meet. “My name is Dr. Alex Schiller and I never sleep alone. Unless I want to. Man or woman, rich or poor, teenage or elderly—NSA will transform you into the one that everyone wants.” For the past three years in New York City, Dr. Alex (not a real doctor) has been performing her hit comedy and dating show Never Sleep Alone to sold-out audiences, helping thousands of people from all over the world transform themselves and fulfill their sociosexual desires. Now, with her signature blend of outrageous humor and profound wisdom, the celebrated guru has created an interactive sex and dating guide that takes you on a fantastic journey of exciting new adventures, self-discovery, and transformation. With her nine NSA principles, her compulsively quotable NSA truths, and her interactive NSA challenges, Dr. Alex inspires us all to laugh at ourselves, to make real human connections, and most importantly, to Never Sleep Alone. Unless we want to.

    Available Formats: Download, CD, MP3 CD, Digital Rental
    Never Sleep Alone by Roslyn Hart

    Never Sleep Alone

    3.4 hrs • 4/5/16 • Unabridged
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    Also: CD, MP3 CD, Digital Rental
  14. 4.3 hrs • 4/5/2016 • Unabridged

    The New York Times bestselling author of I Heart My Little A-Holes and creator of the wildly popular Baby Sideburns parenting blog offers her brutally honest and hilarious take on parenting—showing you that mediocre parents are awesome too. Moms and dads today worry they’re bad parents. They see others on Facebook and Pinterest showing off their smiley, perfect, put-together spotless children creating masterworks of art in their gorgeously designed playrooms. They constantly hear moms brag about whipping up three-course gourmet dinners while their kids sit quietly reading books far beyond their grade level. They read posts from parents complaining that they can’t get their daughter to eat her French fries because she’s too full from broccoli. But Karen Alpert knows this is not reality. Despite what you hear and read every day, you do not need to be perfect to be a kickass parent. Parenting is messy. Parenting is hard. Parenting brings out the best AND the worst in adults. And some of the best parents in the world are mediocre parents. Karen proudly admits she’s a mediocre parent, and in I Want My Epidural Back she’ll make you believe that “mediocre parents are awesome too.” Karen shares her honest, crass, pee-in-your-pants-funny observations, stories, quips, and essays on discipline, potty training, eating, sleeping, and more that will make you laugh and have you nodding your head in recognition. Observing the world of parents and children through her edgy and unique perspective, Karen brings reality into focus, reminding moms and dads everywhere to celebrate and embrace their own not-so-perfect-yet-totally-wonderful parenthood.

    Available Formats: Download, CD, MP3 CD
    I Want My Epidural Back by Karen Alpert

    I Want My Epidural Back

    4.3 hrs • 4/5/16 • Unabridged
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    Also: CD, MP3 CD
  15. 7.8 hrs • 1/26/2016 • Unabridged

    Fishing for piranhas in the Amazon, getting stoned at Fijian kava ceremonies, and witnessing the ancient ritual of land diving on Pentecost Island is the stuff of National Geographic cover stories— and Nevin Martell’s childhood vacations. His family’s globetrotting took them from the South Pacific to South America and many points nowhere in-between. Though their lifestyle choices were eccentric, the locations they visited exotic, and the people they met extraordinary, these escapades are firmly grounded in the trials, tribulations, and tribal rivalries that plague all families. Freak Show without a Tent is a grandly hilarious memoir-misadventure that is equal parts National Lampoon’s Vacation, Romancing the Stone, and Crocodile Dundee. Woven seamlessly into the stories of exploring the far side of the far side, near death experiences, and gastronomical catastrophes, is the story of a young boy coming of age, the evolving relationship between a father and son, and a family discovering its own boundaries. With the honesty and innocence that can only come through the eyes of youth, Martell reveals the symbiosis of interdependence and independence that exist deep within both rain forests and families. To paraphrase a family motto: buy the ticket, take the ride, and hope you survive, so that you can tell your therapist all about it.

    Available Formats: Download, Digital Rental

    Freak Show without a Tent

    7.8 hrs • 1/26/16 • Unabridged
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    Also: Digital Rental
  16. 1.8 hrs • 11/15/2015 • Unabridged

    Mark Twain spills his wit and whimsical sense of humor onto the pages of his novel The Diaries of Adam and Eve. The story tells of the events that took place in the Garden of Eden prior to the entrance of the deceitful serpent. Adam and Eve are not exactly getting along. Through the struggles listed in their diaries, one can safely assume that these two very different human beings are each other’s greatest source of frustration. Intended as a comical insight into the complex relations between men and women, The Diaries of Adam and Eve displays a progression from continual annoyance to a perfect partnership.

    Available Formats: Download

    The Diaries of Adam and Eve

    1.8 hrs • 11/15/15 • Unabridged
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