The Claus Are Out

You'd think that being a Shopping Centre Santa at Christmas in Australia might be fun, but it's actually full of tears, screaming, and tantrums… and the kids can be pretty wild, too. While working as a Stand-up Comedian, Darren Scott Sommer is suddenly thrust into the Big Red Suit at a major Adelaide shopping centre for an entire month. He used to think that handling hecklers was easy, but 6-year-olds can be really mean.

In this hilarious and eye-opening memoir, discover what really happens when you step into Santa's boots. Follow Darren's journey as he takes on the role at one of Adelaide's biggest shopping centres in the outer suburb of Elizabeth. This is where he will spend the next four weeks remembering reindeer names, listening to requests for the latest toys, and being peed on by small children.

And before he can even settle into his new and unusual position, he finds himself being accused by centre management of promising an Xbox to an 8-year-old, getting asked by a little girl if Santa could bring her mum home from the hospital, and being told by a 12-year-old boy that he's not the real Santa Claus… all while struggling to deal with the incredible heat that wearing wool, microfibre, and a polyester beard will produce in the middle of an Australian summer.

Equal parts comedy and confession, this book is for anyone who's ever wondered what life is like behind the big white beard-and for those who know that sometimes the funniest stories come from the most unexpected places.

This is Santa, unwrapped.