The Fryer Ascends

The Fryer Ascends is a theological and culinary epic detailing a conflict between the forces of flavor and imperfection (represented by the prophets Frank and Glen the Fryer) and the forces of order and blandness (led by the metaphysical entity Softly, the Adverb, and the Bureau of Blandness). The narrative charts Frank's journey as he confronts Softly's attempts to sterilize existence by controlling grammar and grease, which leads to "The Great Drying" where all flavor disappears. Frank's exile and Glen's revelations ultimately lead to a cosmic fry-off that melts reality's rigid crust and a literal transformation where the Gospel becomes edible. The story concludes with the reconciliation of chaos and order, symbolized by the Final Receipt requiring an act of honest cleaning, signifying that true holiness lies in acknowledging and caring for the "spills" of life.